SO OBSESSED IT'S NOT FUNNY.: heechul

SuJu you have my heart, but please. PLEASE. I mean, I'm kind of just 8000 times amused at your "ubersexual" concept (seriously - that's officially their concept: "UBERsexual". I just keep laughing. I think omona_queer blog put it best when they described all their teaser photos as Pimps from the 80s), but the random face touching needs to exist only in this teaser video. Not in the actual video.

SPEAKING of the teaser, though.... and disregarding his face-touching shot, this is maaaaaybe the hottest I've ever seen Leeteuk look. He's all mohawked up at the beginning (he's the 5th one to appear). I'm excited for the hairdo. Also, is this teaser sung by Yesung? I'm assuming it is, although it could be someone else - either way, it's pretty gorgeous. Hurrah for Mr. Simple! I started listening to the new album last night, and after I catch up on my Daily Show episodes, I expect it's all I'll listen to today at work.

Here's some of those teaser photos, just to really give you the idea of how ridiculous their "concept" is (also, unfortunately, features the WORST hairdo i've ever seen Leeteuk have. Uhhhhg it's sooooooo bad).

Yesung. Pimp Yesung. Alright. I can dig it. I mean, it's totally crazy, but other than the fact that his face is all washed out and he looks like a ghost, he looks pretty hot in his pink spotted tank top and leather glove thing. And black neck muffler.

Sungmin. I can SO dig it. But that's pretty much my response to Sungmin at all times. With or without a bedazzled gun hung in his pants.

Siwon bein' his Korean Ken-doll self. And SM Entertainment knows how much the ladies loves them some Siwon-abs, so they just decided to stop teasing them. His facial expression is pretty awesome, though.

Ryeowook. What's best about this picture is the fact that I'm pretty sure this is the most masculine I've ever seen him look. For real. Who knew Ryeowook would look so good in bicycle shorts?

Leeteuk. Oh, Leeteuk, what have they done to you? This picture makes me sad. And I hope those ropes are really trying to be an undercover visual support of gay rights. That's the fantasy I'm living with that makes it so I can look at this picture long enough to comment on it.

And Heechul. Top hat, tie, AND a leather harness? Why not. You're motherfucking Kim Heechul. Milky-white skin will get you everywhere.

So. Super Junior.

My induction group into the continually-addictive world of Korean entertainment.

They make pop music. Some of it is ridiculous. (And like, REALLY ridiculous in the best ways.)

Some of it is Amazing. All of it is shit you want to dance to.

There are many members in Super Junior. For a long time they were the biggest boyband in the world. There are also many groups in Super Junior.

Let me list them for you.

LEETEUK - Leader of super junior and eldest member. PERFECT FACE. He has no problem being super-corny, which I love - he's always the first guy into the giant animal suits when given the opportunity. He's also got an absolutely ridiculous laugh. Let's not lie: i'm kind of in love with him. He's .... just kind of perfect.

HEECHUL - DIVA. Fabulous asshole. Hysterical. Master of androgyny. Heechul acts ... well... American, maybe? He's not respectful the way he should be, and he should get in trouble for it, but because he's Heechul, everyone just kind of rolls their eyes and laughs and admires his balls. Because he pretty much just does whatever the fuck he wants to do. He also learns girl-group dances like nobody's business.

YESUNG - The voice! king of FAIL! He's gotten better in the last couple of years, but he was just insanely awkward on tv shows, etc. for the majority of SuJu's early famewhoring days. But his voice is amazing, and he's the vocal base of a lot of SuJu songs. Also, he dances like a tard, which is mostly funny not because it's so bad, but because he doens't seem to have any idea how bad it is. He just gets this mildly offended/sad look on his face when his band members start laughing hysterically and trying to pull him off the stage after he dances. OH! And Yesung is like, bizarre and creepy. Used to sneak into the other members' rooms at night and watch them sleep. And likes to touch that indent in people's upper lips. He's just so fantastically bizarre.

KANGIN - May be the only suju member who actually acts masculine. Occasionally acts like a dick. Is the only member of SuJu I'd trust with the ability to actually lift me off the ground. Kangin is now in the army - partially because it's required, but also seemed like good timing after he'd shamed himself by getting in trouble (DUIs or something else drinking related) multiple times.

SUNGMIN - Likes pink, and defends that personal preference. Is the King of aegyo (acting obnoxiously cute). He is also more built than people give him credit for - martial arts SuJu master # 2 after Hangeng, twirls sticks like none-other. He also has an absolutely crazy cupid's bow of an upper lip. He and Leeteuk duke it out for first place in my SuJu bias list.

HANKYUNG* (aka Hangeng) - Gets a lot of shit for not speakingKkorean perfectly, as he's their original Chinese member. He's also superhot. And for some reason, Heechul really likes him and takes care of him (and teases him the most as well), which just seems so out of character for Heechul but is awesome. Hangeng does have pretty amazing stage presence.

EUNHYUK - The DANCING MACHINE. He was actually the reason I was first transfixed by SuJu - because his dancing in the It's You movie is absolutely captivating in it's utter perfection. He also reminds me of (young) Edward Furlong, who was the first actor I ever had a crush on. He also has the goofiest most adorable gummy smile you've ever seen.

SHINDONG - Takes shit for being the "fat" one, and takes it with grace. Especially since he's really very very average by American standards. Also, Shindong is an awesome dancer, and he's really good on the variety shows with impromptu comments that are actually funny. He did (or does) MC for a children's TV show, which also seems totally appropriate.

SIWON - Asian Ken Doll. King of hand gestures. He loves god a lot. I guess Siwon tries to make nice with everybody. Mostly I think he's funny for all the hand gestures, but otherwise I kind of ignore him because he's so overly stereotypically perfect looking that I'm kind of turned off. He models a lot, and makes more money than any of the other members because of it (and his family was already loaded to begin with).

DONGHAE - Acts like he's 7 years old. All the time. He's maybe not... super.... quick. ....
To catch on to what's happening. But that is definitely part of his charm when paired with his super wide-set eyes. He is also an amazing dancer. And he really really likes Eunhyuk, and they're adorable together.

KIBUM - Cares about acting more than singing with SuJu :( I feel like I don't know enough about him to describe him much, but he's still awesome by default.

RYEOWOOK - So pretty. I do kind of think Ryeowook is the most effeminate member of SuJu - and he sings similarly. He does have an amazing voice, and SuJu songs would be sorely lacking if he weren't around. He's just tiny and adorable.

KYUHYUN - VOICE LIKE BUTTER. Youngest member. Mischievous and snarky in the best ways. He's just so fucking adorable, but then he's also actually a bit tall and masculine looking - which is a bit rare in the kpop world. Well done, Kyu, well done.

HENRY** - Has chubby little cheeks that Ryeowook likes to pinch? He plays violin! And speaks english really well, which is nice, since after Kibum went awol SuJu's pretty lacking in the English skills department. (He's Canadian!)

ZHOUMI** - I used to get him confused with Siwon. Now I don't. His legs are very, very long. (I.E. Zhoumi is so tall that I never invested much time in him.)

I kind of want to do a post about each member individually, because they're all fabulous in their own way. And they're all fabulous together. Really, kind of the best thing about SuJu is the endless library of youtube clips available to watch of them just being fame whores and interacting with each other. And I will. Someday. I'm still in the process of compiling images, clips, etc. (Mostly for my own fangirl archival purposes, but under the guise of posts for this blog.)

But for now, here's a clip of Heechul dancing with his cat. Because when you go on a radio show, you bring your cat, right?

SuJuSubGroups:

SuperJunior-M

(M for Mandarin?) The Chinese touring group. They're super-popular and recently expanded. I don't get the hats. But Kpop stylists are INSANE:

SuperJunior-H

(The "H" is for Happy. Seriously.) The exploit-the-adorable-asian-factor group:

SuperJunior-T

(T for Trot. It's a style of traditional Korean pop music.) The cracktastic WTF group:

SuperJunior-KRY

(KRY for Kyuhyun, Ryeowook, Yesung.) Ballad group of the best singers in SuJu:

AND THAT'S SUPER JUNIOR. IN A (large) NUTSHELL.

* SuJu got some drama, yall. Hankyung is actually Chinese - and he had a nasty ass contract that he eventually got out of and returned to China and is now doing his own solo stuff. But we (and by "we" I mean all the crazy SuJu fangirls, or "ELFs") still love him and wish him the best. (But also want him back. Come back Hangeng!)

**The other stars are for Henry and Zhoumi, who were not part of the original group of 13, but were added later as part of Super Junior-M which is SuJu's Chinese subgroup. Many ELFs weren't happy with the additional members, but I feel like thats pretty much faded. Especially because with Hangeng being gone, and Kangin gone in the army now, and Kibum MIA because he's pursuing his acting career - SuJu just seems too small with only 10 members, and so having Henry and Zhoumi there helps round out the numbers. Also they're awesome. And Henry actually legit speaks English 'cause he's Canadian, and it's pretty great to actually hear one of them speak English in songs without sounding... well. Like they sound. :P

SO OBSESSED IT'S NOT FUNNY.

SISTAR videos

STOP TOUCHING YOUR FACE!

SuJu Introduction (for real, yo)